Relationships
Mr. and Mrs. RN
By Joan Tupponce

Marriage + Working Together = Perfect Balance

Nurses Anita and Rich Nochisaki occasionally work side-by-side in the recovery room on the Chippenham campus of CJW in Richmond. But not everyone in the department is aware that the two are husband and wife.

“I think that speaks to our professionalism at work,” Rich says. “When we are together, I’m a nurse and she’s a nurse and that’s it. People respect us for that.”

The two started working for CJW17 years ago – Anita in the cardiac care unit and Rich in the open heart unit. “When we spoke to the recruiter we said we have a two for one deal for you,” Rich recalls.

Even then coworkers were surprised when they learned that Anita and Rich were married. “People never put it together because they only look at our first names,” Rich says.

The Nochisakis are more the rule than the exception. Many married couples who work as nurses at the same facility have a strict delineation between their work and their relationship. Contrary to the steamy flirtations that viewers see on shows like “Grey’s Anatomy” and “ER,” romance for this couple stops at the hospital door.

“That’s all Hollywood spice to keep up your interest,” observes Anita. “I guess they do it because the life of a nurse isn’t that glamorous.”

Anita says she’s heard of a few hospital affairs but “it’s not what you see on those shows. When I was younger I thought those shows were degrading to the profession, now I just find them amusing.”

It was Anita who suggested that Rich get into nursing. “She was going to nursing school and I was impressed with what they were learning,” Rich says.

At one point, Rich found himself working under the direction of his wife. “She was more senior in the unit,” he explains. “I never had a problem being subordinate to her. I respect my wife’s nursing skills and her judgment.”

Even then coworkers were unaware that the couple was married. “They didn’t know until we said something about,” Rich recalls. “Today the joke is that I have 15 wives in the PACU because I’m the only male in the unit. It’s kind of interesting that my wife jokes about that.”

Certified registered nurse anesthetists Beth and Ken King met during their senior year of nursing school. “I had said I would never date anyone I went to school with but I changed the rules [for Ken],” Beth says. “In school we kept things separate. We each had our own friends.”

The Kings have been working on the Chippenham campus of CJW for four years. “We work similar hours except when we are working calls,” Beth explains. “Then our hours vary.”

Even though they work the same shift, the two don’t normally work together. “Ninety percent of the time I don’t see him during the day except for passing him in the hall,” Beth says.

The Kings also keep their relationship professional at work. “We have a comfortable relationship,” Beth says, adding that she sees no downside to working together. “There are too many upsides. One is that we can cover for each other. We have a built-in backup.”

Nurses Allan and Naomi Aylesworth met at the VCU School of Nursing. Allan is now a nurse practitioner student and Naomi works in the progressive care nursery at Henrico Doctors’ Hospital in Richmond.

Allan remembers when he and Naomi were in the honors program at school. “There were only five men in the class and when you’re a male nurse there’s a stigma that you’re gay, perverted or not smart enough to be a doctor,” Allan says.

After they started dating, Allan and Naomi kept their relationship a secret. At least they thought they did. Their body language told a different story. “When people found out we were dating they complained to the faculty that we were helping each other,” Allan says. “We were really surprised. We didn’t see what the big deal was.”

After marrying, the two worked together at Sentara Careplex Hospital in Hampton. Naomi worked in intensive care; Allan worked in the step-down intensive care unit. “We were [in rooms] next to each other,” Allan recalls. “When the doors would open, we could see each other.”

Like the Nochisakis and the Kings, Allan and Naomi kept their relationship on a professional level. But Allan admits at times that was difficult for the newlyweds. “I wanted to give her a hug but we were at work,” he says. “I had to keep that kind of stuff at home. At work, it’s hands off.”

He does recall one time when Naomi went to grab for his hand at work. “I was like, ‘no’,” he says. “[We don’t want] someone to see two people in scrubs holding hands.”

The couple laughs at the thought of sneaking into an out-of-the-way closet for a secret tryst like is often the case on television. “I haven’t seen too many medicine closets that people weren’t going into every five minutes,” Allan says, laughing.

Over the years, there have been a few bumps in the road, like the time a school friend started making advances toward Allan. “That had the potential to be a high drama situation but Naomi took it in stride,” Allan says.

Naomi admits she gets occasional glances from a doctor here and there but she just shrugs them off. “Life is not like a television show,” she says. “Just working in the hospital I never see the drama, the hooking up. You are so busy during the day that I’m not sure where you’d find the time to have an affair at work. And if that did happen, everyone would end up getting fired.”